How To Help Young Athletes Set Goals in Sports
By Dr. Patrick J. Cohn and Lisa E Cohn
Too often, sports parents set goals for
their kids that are different than the kids' goals. It's important to help sports kids identify their own goals and then help them
follow through on them.
Says Dony Wilcher, a popular basketball coach in Portland, Ore., "I had one parent who wanted the world
for his child. He went out of his way to get him the right shoes and send him to the best camps. At the end of it all, he was perplexed
that the kid was not a superstar. In some cases, kids will veer away from the sport altogether if the parents' goals are different
than theirs."
At first, many sports kids generally want to play to have fun and be with friends. At that point, that's their
goal. It's not necessary for parents to set goals with them. Adults want to structure the sports experience for kids. They can take
the fun out of a simple pick up game in the back yard.
When sports kids begin to be competitive-when they play in tournaments
or join competitive teams-it's time to begin talking about their goals. This might be appropriate for some children as young as 7
or 8-if they display unusual talent and motivation.
For example, at peaksports.com, we worked with one 8-year-old motocross racer
who spent four hours per day training. It would be appropriate to talk about goals with a child who competes at the national level.
When you're talking with your young athlete, begin with a broad, open-ended question.
If, for example. your child's goal is to
try out for and make his or her high school basketball team, that's the long-term goal. Ask the child what he or she needs to do to
make the team.
Evaluate his or her skills in dribbling, free-throw shooting, and defense, for example. Try to de-emphasize the
long-term goal of making the team. When young athletes are too preoccupied with making the team, they may impose too many expectations
on themselves and undermine their confidence. Instead, parents should help young athletes identify smaller, shorter-term goals, such
as improving their free-throw shooting.
Once you've helped your young athletes identify their goals, it's your job to help them
follow through on them. The parents, coaches and athletes need to work as a team. Parents should support their kids by driving them
to practices, cheering them on, and finding ways to ensure they are able to follow through on their commitments.
